Jan is an award-winning columnist, author, and popular emcee and keynote speaker at senior expos on “Finding Love & Romance at Any Age!”, “Keeping Your Dreams Alive”, and “Healing through Writing”. Her new book, Hot Chocolate for Seniors, recently won both national and international gold seal awards, as well as a 2012 Indie gold medal which Jan received at recent ceremonies held at The Plaza Hotel in New York City. Hot Chocolate for Seniors is available for purchase at hotchocolateforseniors.com or (909) 793-6419.
This month’s topic: When You Feel Like Giving Up
In today’s world, there is no such thing as one perfect match. The truth is there are probably hundreds, thousands–and possibly millions—of ideal soul mates who may very well be on an active quest in search of you this very minute!
Never before have so many social networks and dating websites been available to us–they’re natural “incubators” for finding love and romance, you know–but it’s a numbers game, folks, and nothing more. So let the races begin! After all, there are nearly 100 million single adults in America alone.
Okay, so you think it’s begun to feel like a full time job sifting through all those profiles, winks, and flirts on Internet dating sites in hopes of separating authentic honest candidates from the not-so-authentic drama kings, queens, or imposters. You say you’re picky and not willing to compromise? Well, that’s exactly the way you should be. By all means, stick to your standards and do not be easily swayed from what you know in your heart is right for you.
But if you’ve made earnest efforts to put yourself out there and still haven’t connected with the love of your life, please consider one more suggestion before throwing in the towel. How about trying out a dating coach or professional matchmaking service? It may be worth a try…as long as you’re willing to spring for the expense involved. Judy met Frank through such a service, and that was eleven years ago. They’ve been a happily married couple for nearly a decade and have enjoyed endless fun, whether they’re on a fishing or boating excursion, firing up their home barbecue, or tearing up the dance floor on the senior dance circuit. Yes, both feel it was well worth the money because of all the ongoing love, companionship, and joy which they continue to share.
Just because you haven’t found the perfect match yet doesn’t mean that there aren’t lots of good quality single men and women out there. But it just may be time to call in a relationship expert who will give you personal attention and help you fine-tune your search for the man or woman of your dreams. Professional matchmaking services boast that they “take the legwork out of dating” by interviewing many candidates before pairing up suitable matches. Before selecting such a service, however, it makes good sense to check out their track record. You might even ask to speak with some satisfied clients to get a sense of what lies ahead.
I’ve already written about the options of using online dating sites, speed dating, carrying calling cards with your first name only plus phone number to hand to special people whom you meet in the natural course of your day and would like to know better, plus remaining open to meeting new people everywhere you go, including while standing in those crowded lines at the bank or grocery store. If you find someone attractive, please don’t be afraid to strike up small talk, ask a question, or make light conversation—anything to get a conversation rolling.
You never know where or when your true love may show up. So I urge you to please keep your dreams alive, and never never never give up trying. Whereas Harry was Sue’s 200th date, Sue was Harry’s very first date. He was so grateful that she’d hung in there and hadn’t given up on taking just one more chance to meet someone new. I’m happy to announce that this very happy senior couple recently celebrated their fifth wedding anniversary.
As I’ve said before, some of us haven’t seen our greatest victories yet. It’s not at all how we start that counts, it’s how we finish!