Jan Fowler will emcee a senior dating conference for 300 people June 6 at the Rancho Cucamonga Senior Center in CA. Both widowed and divorced, she is a frequent speaker on senior dating and loves to share the story of how she herself met “just the right man” in a ballroom dancing class at a local senior center. Look for her new television show, “The Jan Fowler Show for Baby Boomers & Others”, to be nationally aired soon. You may order her new book, Hot Chocolate for Seniors, at hotchocolateforseniors.com or (909) 793-6419.
This month’s topic: Loving relationships yield infinite rewards.
One of our greatest needs as human beings is to feel spiritually, physically, and emotionally connected to others. From cradle to coffin, it’s a known fact that people of all ages thrive far better when touched, talked to, cared about, and loved. In fact, the overall quality of life is greatly enhanced and improved by that special connection.
Yes, loving relationships yield infinite rewards, including many overlooked keys to happiness. While healthy people are usually socially bonded and enjoy a better sense of well-being, socially isolated and lonely people often experience a sense of emptiness and declining health. Haven’t we all read of studies which show that married people live longer?
Oh, there is so much power in love!
Since I am both widowed and divorced, I recall the initial scars of loss and grief, plus the dreaded fear of starting over again. And yet I longed for another rewarding relationship “with just the right person” to share my life with, to go places with, and to talk to. I recall how uneasy I felt at first and how I kept putting it off–it seemed so much easier to choose emotional isolation over the fear of getting hurt.
But “No!” a voice screamed in my brain. “No, no, no! You must take a chance and put yourself out there!”
And so one day, I met David in a ballroom dance class—a waltz and rumba lesson, I vividly recall—on an ordinary Monday afternoon at a local senior center. We quickly became dance partners, then dating partners. That was four years ago, and the rest is history…I’m happy to say that he and I have been together ever since.
Many of my senior contemporaries are meeting quality men and women every day on Internet dating sites and are learning to laugh and live again. They report a better sense of belonging from having developed new close personal relationships. I feel that we seniors need to bombard ourselves with lots of encouraging “self-talk” by substituting “I’m too old to try something new” with “It’s never too late to discover someone new and wonderful!”
We all need purpose, friendship, supportive people, and loving relationships. By the way, volunteering is always a wonderful first step in making some new social connections–I urge you to give it a try.
Someone once said, “Don’t ask if it’s hard, ask if it’s worth it.” And, yes, it’s worth it! So please keep at it and never give up. I sure am glad I put myself out there and attended that ballroom dance class…just think…it was just another ordinary Monday afternoon…