It is no surprise that men lack a little in the emotions department. It isn’t that they do not have emotion, they just find it incredibly difficult to express. When they do express their emotions, this act does not necessarily come off very well. Women are more confident in showing their emotions and in a certain way they have more practice expressing their emotions through words. A man doesn’t necessarily get this practice and if he has been burned in the past, showing emotion becomes increasingly more difficult. This is why women must be the emotional backbone for a man.
Becoming a man’s emotional backbone is not meant for some guy that you just started hanging out with or hooked up with at a bar. If you are seriously dating this person and you care deeply for him, over time it becomes your responsibility to be able to control his emotions and to help him express the way he feels. This is not limited to just emotions dealing with your relationship but rather in all of the interactions that a man has. It is quite a task, but the right woman for every man is willing to take on this job.
If your man is upset about how someone is acting at an event that revolves around him, then you should be able to handle the situation. You may have to take him apart to talk about what is going on and to assure him that you will do what you can to resolve the situation without causing more pain. Parents often hurt their children when they do not have a particularly solid relationship. As the partner, you have to pick up on this type of emotional pain and soothe it the best you can. He needs to be strong and you are his emotional backbone to let him know that he is strong.
Becoming his emotional backbone does not involve you pestering him to open up to you. Over time, men become more comfortable speaking about their emotions to you if you have gained their trust. There are certain ways of extracting information such as asking a single question a day and piecing together the story. Men do not want to be bombarded by questions so you have to take it slow. It could take years to really understand the emotional maze that men have pent up inside. Engaging in relaxing activities can also help him to feel safe and willing to open up to you. Over time you will learn how he works and how he feels. Once you do, it is your turn to become the emotional backbone that he needs in life.
Photo via stephenkirsch
