Senior Dating

Jan Fowler is a TV producer/host, national speaker, and award-winning columnist on senior topics.  She is both widowed and divorced, has done considerable dating, and enjoys discussing the serious relationship she now shares with a gentleman whom she met in a ballroom dance class at a senior citizens’ center.
Look for her new television show, “The Jan Fowler Show for Baby Boomers & Others” which will be nationally syndicated beginning in January.  The show will focus on  topics of interest for those approaching retirement, including current events about the future of social security, healthcare, retirement benefits, etc. After November 20, you may order Jan’s new book, Hot Chocolate for Seniors, featuring more than 100 heartwarming, humorous, inspiring stories–including real-life stories about senior love and romance–from hotchocolateforseniors.com.

This month’s topic:  “A New Year, a New Beginning!”

A new year.  A new beginning.  How lucky we are!  The new year always opens the door to a fresh start, renewed hope, and provides us the chance to set new goals or remind ourselves of the endless possibilities that still lie ahead for our lives.

Time to drop the fear of failure and not be afraid to move forward.  But a fresh start does require putting the past behind us.  So let’s close that door firmly on the old year.  Look forward, not backward.  To stay in balance, we must forget about the setbacks and failures of yesterday and instead boast a positive shining winning attitude, full of positive expectancy.   Because we should never never never give up on the hope of finding love and romance again! It happens all the time.

After all, Marilyn met Larry while checking her mail in the lobby of the apartment building where he lived on the seventh floor and she on the fourth.  Amanda met Will at a forty-fifth high school reunion, and I met David in a waltz and rumba ballroom dance class on an ordinary Monday afternoon at a local Senior Center.

Could it be that all of us were open to the possibility of meeting someone new?  You know what I mean.  That we hung our “availability” shingle rather than our “no vacancy” sign on our foreheads?  Being open is an outlook and attitude which may need to be cultivated and practiced, you know.  It’s a way of connecting with another person, perhaps first with a casual smile and confident eye contact, then followed by light-hearted remarks, including good-natured humor if possible.

You might start by introducing yourself–first name only—and asking a simple question, e.g., “How do you happen to know…(here, you mention the host’s name if you met at a party)?” or “How long have you been coming to…(name the class you’re attending)?” or “How are you liking (again, name the activity you’re both participating in) so far?”  I remember asking David which dance—waltz or rumba–he liked the best.  It really doesn’t take much to make small talk, but you may want to hone your skills by practicing on total strangers in everyday places such as while waiting in a long line at the movies.

Even though school and work are among the most common meeting places, the Internet is buzzing with potential partners just waiting to fall in love with you.  Admittedly, it takes some effort to create an upbeat profile, post a recent photo, and weed out the “unsuitables”, but I nevertheless urge you to give it a try!  New dating sites are opening up all the time, so use bravado and switch to a new one if that’s what it takes to lift your spirits.  After all, Jerry and Donna, my dear friends who met online and discovered they only lived ten minutes apart from each other, are still as happy as can be after five years of marriage.

It’s a brand new year, folks, so please stay open to meeting your true love and never give up!

Jan Fowler is a TV producer/host, national speaker, and award-winning columnist on senior topics.  She is both widowed and divorced, has done considerable dating, and enjoys discussing the serious relationship she now shares with a gentleman whom she met in a ballroom dance class at a senior citizens’ center.
Look for her new television show, “The Jan Fowler Show for Baby Boomers & Others” which will be nationally syndicated beginning in January.  The show will focus on  topics of interest for those approaching retirement, including current events about the future of social security, healthcare, retirement benefits, etc. After November 20, you may order Jan’s new book, Hot Chocolate for Seniors, featuring more than 100 heartwarming, humorous, inspiring stories–including real-life stories about senior love and romance–from hotchocolateforseniors.com.

This month’s topic: “What ever happened to my high school sweetheart?”

By now, we’ve come to recognize the importance of remaining open to meeting new love everywhere we go.  Which means always looking our best, smiling at members of the opposite sex, making eye contact with strangers, and cheerfully replying to anyone who greets us.  Even taking advantage of the opportunity to strike up small talk or light conversation while waiting in line at the bank, check-out counter, or post office may send the signal that we just might be available to continue the conversation at another time, possibly over coffee.  And although many seniors have succeeded in finding romance and friendship via online dating services, I wonder how many have ever made the effort to reconnect with a hard-to-forget high school or college sweetheart.

In my new book, Hot Chocolate for Seniors, I devoted one entire chapter to senior love and romance and would now like to share one inspiring love story in hopes that it may give you new ideas about a fresh approach to seeking a loving mate.  This touching story excerpt is found in the chapter titled “Falling in Love Again”.  Do hope you enjoy…

Five Small Diamonds

by Myrna Lou Goldbaum

I remember the time I was working at a Colorado fair when an older gentleman approached me to ask if he could please have his palm read.  My poster, which read “SOUL MATE SPECIALIST,” had apparently caught his eye.  When we first began the reading, I could see that his first love had been twenty years old, but that it had never led to marriage.  He had offered, but she’d turned him down because he was about to leave for the service.  She feared he might not return home and refused to promise to wait.

His immediate response and reaction to my reading was an overwhelming “Yes!”  He quickly added, “Flying in a plane over Guadalcanal, I even carried her picture in my watch fob on a chain all through the war.  But when I returned home she had already married someone else.”

I continued my reading. “You were married at age twenty-seven and your marriage lasted fifty years, but you’ve been a widower now for about a year.”

Nodding, he asked, “And are you able to see the experience that I just had?”

Oh, yes.  I could see that his old flame had reappeared in his life once more, and also that something very wonderful was about to happen.  It was then that he began to relate his inspiring story.

As a Peoria, Illinois, native, he was an alumnus of Peoria High School and his alumni newsletter carried the announcement of his wife’s death.  His old girlfriend—the love of his youth who, by now, had lost her own mate four years earlier—read his name in the newsletter, then spent four months trying her best to track him down.  First, she called their high school, then the Chamber of Commerce, his relatives, as well as old Illinois friends.  At last, she was able to locate the brother of his best friend who explained that this gentleman was living in Colorado Springs.  She called Information and finally got his telephone number.

“I see that you have been in contact,” I said, adding, “and I see travel, plus a move in the near future.”

“Yes, she lives in Texas!” he excitedly explained.  “When she called me, I almost fell down.  She said she was lonely and invited me to her home, so I immediately went to see her the very next day!  We spent one wonderful week together and quickly rekindled our love.

“While we were out shopping at the mall one day, I managed to slip into a jewelry store while she was next door in a dress shop.  I asked to see engagement rings, so the storeowner pulled out two trays of assorted rings to show me.  Some were beautiful solitaires, while others were set with smaller diamonds.

“As soon as she came out of the dress shop, I called her into the jewelry store and proposed right there on the spot.  Well, she cried, I cried, the store owner cried, and all the sales clerks cried too.  We were so happy that they even snapped a picture of us to use in their ads.  When I told her she could choose any ring at all, she pushed the solitaire ring tray aside. ‘This one,’ she said, and pointed and smiled. “I’d like a simple ring with five small diamonds set in platinum.’

“It was not one of the more expensive rings on display so I was perplexed, and had to ask what made her decide to select that particular ring.  ‘It has five diamonds,’ she replied with a smile, ‘which will always represent the five decades when we missed being together.’

“So now I’m moving to Texas! I plan to take care of her for the rest of our days,” he said, beaming with excitement.

Myrna Lou Goldbaum is a master palmist years with sixty years’ experience reading forty-seven thousand palms. She is a teacher, coach, entertainer, TV producer-host of “Soul Mate Connections,” and author of May I See Your Hand?, Soul Mate Connections, and Diary of a Palm Reader.  (303) 651-6273.  www.myrnaloupalmistry.com or  hmg@privatei.com